1 - How old do you act? My age. Unlike some people....*sigh*
2 - Why is the sky blue? Why do fools fall in love? Just because.
3 - Do you burp, fart, or both in front of others? Try not to, but if you insist....
4 - Someone's writing a book based on your life. What would the title be? Cluttered Chaos:Welcome to my world
5 - How many days in a row can you go without taking a dump? 3? Haven't counted before.
6 - Favorite childhood cartoon? Guess. lalalalalalalalalala. I'm gonna smurf you if you tell.
7 - Have you ever caught someone in the act of masturbating? Nope. I'm a little more discreet than that. Do YOU wanna catch me? Hmm....I haven't even caught anybody before. *sigh*
8 - Favorite food to make/bake/cook/etc? cookies. And Brownies.
9 - What's one redeeming quality about mushrooms? I get to eat them with a pretty FUNgi...
10 - What's wrong with Richard Simmons? He is an overgrown, overenthusiastic boy.
11 - Name one celebrity who needs to come out of the closet. Richard Simmons. Enough said.
12 - Name one redeeming quality about asparagus. I heard it makes your pee superhuman or something. That's gotta be cool right?
13 - If "We Are the Champions", what are you? a champion with you I guess. Why do you get to be a champion? I could be a "Material Girl" too. (Except I don't have that much money...) *sigh*
14 - What's something they taught you in school that should never be taught to anyone? Pick your nose. Well, to be honest, I didn't learn how to pick my nose in school BUT there are kids in school who pick their nose and collect the boogers straight through high school. I know, EW right? Gross. Do not teach my kids to pick their nose. You can teach them how to wipe their butt though. Holy gross underwear Batman.
15 - What's the deal with Steven Segal anyways? He smokes cigars? Maybe?
16 - Name two movies that should have never been made. Batman sequels. 1 and 2 were okay but every one after that is stretching is a bit.
17 - Do you enjoy to point, stare, and laugh at others? Only you my friend. Only you. ;) *WINK WINK*
18 - Name one or more words that every time you hear them, make you cringe. boogers unemployment
19 - Have you ever put anything up your ass? No but I use to put stuff up other people's bums, I used to be a CNA (certified nurse assistant) suppositories...Ya, it's a gross job.
20 - What can you do better than most? Dance. Have you watched me dance? ;))
21 - Have you smoked pot? Nope. Sorry.
22 - Would you wrestle a member of the same sex, nude, in pudding for 10 minutes for one million dollars? Seriously? Hmm...For 1 million dollars? I think I'd fool everybody and wear those nude suits they get to wear on Soap operas...lol. then I'd wrestle Jennifer Anniston. Ya know, just 'cause.
23 - Happiest moment of your life? I'm going with Snuggie on this one, when I get done with these dang questions....
24 - Name in order, the body parts of the opposite sex you notice first. Face, eyes, lips, chest, and package...ya know the WHOLE package a$$ and all....
25 - What or where's the furthest you've been away from home? Don't know.
26 - Have you ever been to Africa? No. Have you?
27 - Can you currently do a split? Banana split currently. I eat the split..banana that is.
28 - What's better - a knee-jerk reaction or a polish knee slap?a polish knee slap. Probably.
29 - Ever given anyone a dutch oven? Nope. I've made dutch oven potatoes though.
30 - What's your favorite kind of apple? red. ;)
31 - Favorite Muppet? Mrs. Piggy.
32 - Squash just doesn't sound very tasty. What say you? Squash. yellow. small. I squished your squash.
34 - Favorite number?8
35 - Favorite type of pet? the one that leaves me ALONE.
36 - Favorite sexual position? The one that leaves me breathless and not wanting it for a couple of days.
39 - When's the last time you vomited? I saw my husband's vomit this morning. But me, It's been a while.
40 - Name one product you use that everyone ought to use. soap.
41 - What's worse - having your period or spraining your ankle? Period. Cramps are a bitch. (Sorry but they are.)
42 - What sport can you play well? Hmm...Game cube. :)
43 - What's the funniest thing you've heard/seen/done in the past week? I read Snuggie's 100 questions.
44 - Are you interested in being friends with someone on death row? No way. Should I be concerned about you?
45 - What's 4+3*800/3? Don't have a calculator handy. Sorry.
46 - Who would make a better President - Sarah Palin or Cookie Monster? Cookie Monster and Snuffle upagus FTW.
47 - Have you ever done a snow angel in the nude? All snow angels are nude after you make them.
48 - Who's your favorite Golden Girl? Blanche.
49 - Have you ever taken a dump out a window? I'm gonna dump you out the window in a second if you don't stop asking me questions.
50 - Favorite kind of ice cream? Chocolate cherry cordial.
51 - Have you ever used Magic Shell on a member of the opposite sex? Nope.
52 - If you live in California, is Japan still considered to be the "Far East?" Why would I know? I live in the desert.
53 - What's the last thing you touched aside from the keyboard or the mouse? a brownie.
54 -Assuming you own an iPod/mp3 player, hit random and list the artist/song for the next five entries. HA! I don't own an ipod.
55 - Who's better - Rolling Stones or the Beatles? Beatles. "To everything turn turn turn...there is a season turn turn turn..."
That's it. I can't take it anymore. 56. That's all I can answer.
I can't take it anymore.
And my kids are running around naked.
Yeah, Don't ask.
They are WILD.
And a bunch of monkeys....*sigh*